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Dear Conservative Friends,

November 9, 2012

Don’t believe the hype.

You want to know what happened. Why did you lose? Perhaps like Shelley Dankert, (love you Shelley!) and the Romney campaign staff, you spent a not small part of Tuesday night utterly shocked as to your defeat. I understand. Your feelings are natural. And you’re going to be offered a lot of excuses in the coming weeks. We’re hearing a lot of them already and while they are amusing, they are also an indicator of the direction the Republican Party is going to take in the face of yet another electoral beat down.

From a liberal standpoint those indicators are outstanding! You are clearly going to blame any outside metric you can think of and keep doing what you are doing in the hopes that what has failed twice will suddenly, as if by magic, succeed this time.

From the standpoint of someone who really, super, very much, a lot wants a functioning government? Not so much.

As a result, I have complied for you a handy list of the bullshit excuses you will hear in the coming weeks and the actual facts to counter them. Why am I doing this. Because it’s up to you now, Conservative friends. You’ve got to drag you party, kicking and screaming if necessary, back into the land of fact based sanity. If you don’t you’re going to spend a lot of time feeling this way.

Things That Are Not The Reason Obama Won A Second Term

1. Karl Rove thinks that the Republican drubbing was the fault of Hurricane Sandy. So does Hayley Barbour. So does Mitt Romeny, apparently.

Rachel Maddow did a good riff on this on last night’s show.

She had a number of fantastic points but she missed an obvious one. In the FOX echo chamber, they were crowing about the storm, thinking that it would be of benefit to Romney. Why were they doing that? Because there was no other possible hope that Romney was going to come anywhere close to picking up New York, New Jersey, any part of New England or Maryland. I don’t care if Chris Christie had escorted him into the state on the back of a unicorn with angels singing Romney’s praises. He wasn’t going to win New Jersey. Not happening.

But suddenly, in the face of the spanking they got on Tuesday, it’s all the storm’s fault. Um, no. That is not true. Anyone who tells you that is wrong or deliberately lying. Do not believe them.

2. It was the convention.

Sometimes this one is also blamed on the weather or just the lack of time that was available to list many, many wonderful things that Republicans want to do for the nation. I watched every minute of the Republican convention and you know what it actually lacked? Coherence. Two words. Clint. Eastwood. ‘Nuff said.

3. Race or Gender

The talking heads are using the word “demographics, but they really mean race. According to their narrative, the racial makeup of the nation has changed and as a result, Obama won. Except no, that doesn’t make any sense because no matter how large a portion of the actual population minorities are, we’re still minorities right now. White people make up 78% of the population, according to the most recent numbers. Women make up just over half.

Guess what? In order for any president to win, they need to have al huge number of white people vote for them.

4. Desire for “Stuff”

Everyone wants stuff. You, my Conservative friend, want stuff. You are willing to work to obtain that stuff. So is everyone else. Come on, I know that 47% crap is a balm. I know it soothes you but it’s total bullshit and you have to call it out for what it is unless you want to stay in this losing position.

Things That Are The Reason Obama Won A Second Term

1. Your message is crappy.

For real. Have you read your platform? Let me summarize for you, “We hate black people, women, gays, and anyone also who might not be a white person over the age of 50 or so. Plus, plus, also and, we can’t do math.”

Fix your shit.

2. There is no number two. It’s really just that one thing.

Please understand, I don’t mean you should change your delivery. I mean, you need to change what you are delivering because it is long past its expiration date and it’s starting to smell. Don’t just throw a token minority or two or twelve or twenty up on stage or at the head of the party. That was a move that did not fool one person who was not Michael Steele. You’re “hey look, we found a black guy/woman/Latino/gay/lesbian too!” approach is is condescending on its face. You are telling us that we already agree with you. Trust me when I tell you that we do not.

When you seen as the party of racism. sexism, homophobia  and every other small minded bias that you have been clawing to keep a hold of for the past decade, the answer is to stop doing things that are racist, not point to some token minority and pretend that solves the problem.

When your fiscal plan sends the nation in a financial nosedive, change the damn plan! Don’t double, triple and quadruple down on the same plan. And really don’t do your level best to prevent any other plan from working and then blame the other side. The world does not work that way anymore. We can hear you when you talk. We can hear you in real time and then we can go back and read pretty much every word you’ve ever said out loud in public and compare it to what you are saying now. Welcome to the 21st century. We live here.

When you say you are the party of American values, you may want to figure out what modern America values. Because our values and your values don’t match. We value freedom and equality,. You apparently value disenfranchisement and separate but equal.

Get it together guys. I can’t keep doing this for you.

2 Comments leave one →
  1. November 10, 2012 6:36 AM

    If only these words would not fall upon deaf ears. Well, I guess we can pray that they’ll get it eventually.

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